i understand THE new way

there's a man with a red mullet and no mom

and there's a young asian couple

eating in complete silence and without

ever looking at each other

he is so pleased with the chocolate shake

he ordered and she's unhappy about something

and i get up to go to the bathroom

where there's someone vomitting loudly in the stall

coughing and spitting between each surge of digested food

i go back to sit at the table with my mom

and think about how her uncle calls us around christmas and

plays carols over the phone on the big

damn organ he's got set up at his farm

and how he's as beautiful as a soul can come

and think about how my friend calls me around when it's best and

plays songs on the piano over the phone on the piano she's got set up in her room

and how she's as beautiful as a soul can come

my steak comes a couple inches thick and bleeding more than the bread

can soak up

and i think about how i can hold

more blood in my hands

than i can in my heart

i thought if you'd betrayed me

it would just be with a kiss

i didn't think it was possible

for things to turn to this

if he heard the sound of the bones

in my knees (the knee-bones i suppose)

being smashed with ball-peen hammers

my dad would not do anything so foolish

as to rush to the room it was happening

in and try and stop the arms swinging

the tools

i mean

if the moment of his resurrection

is before that moment

Moi, j'avais jamais rien dit. Rien

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