when i'm dreaming i'm at an airport and she is there

with a pale while husband and two beautiful dark-skinned twin little girls

in flowered dresses that are always laughing or smiling

we are in america

there is some sort of disaster happening

we want to go home

she shows me she's missing a breast

her skin is stretched tight against her rib

when i'm awake it's cold, snowing and dark

my foosteps are loud as they turn all the snowflakes identical

sometimes i can hear a car pass

my hands are freezing, but it seems very wrong to put them in pockets

they want to turn red and be marked by this

there was a dead bird with its chest torn open on the ground beside the path in the morning

now there are only white feathers sticking through the top of the snow

they are the parts of ground that don't sparkle

the tiniest white rabbit with a small brown spot runs out in front of me

i follow its footsteps a bit to try and see it again

i give up and head to the car

it barely starts

Moi, j'avais jamais rien dit. Rien

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