it was night time and she said

i like you best in the mornings

you smile so much and you're so happy

and cute

and i said it's cause i haven't had

to live through anything yet and

every morning i forget how the world

is not very good

she said, i know


and she smiled a smile

that she tried to make

look like a fake smile

trying to look real

but i could tell it was a real smile

trying to fake looking

like a fake smile trying

to fake looking real

and she held my hand

with both of hers

(arms reaching across the bed)

i looked at her legs, i looked her feet, i looked at the polish peeling off her toenails


i apologized for not

being able maintain joyfulness

for any length of time


and she said it was ok

with a real smile


she doesn't like poetry

i don't like most of her friends

we're both always apologizing



Moi, j'avais jamais rien dit. Rien

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